Post by Zip on Jul 29, 2008 13:37:40 GMT -5
Each page was plastered with a chart of a chessboard.
Brow furrowing, he leaned forward with one hand cupping his chin.
A friend of his once told him, "It doesn't matter how much you play chess-I mean, you don't get better."
He could see where his friend was coming from. It's not as if the pawns could go only three spaces forward if he stopped playing.
The rules stayed the same.
But studying would help give him a better understanding of the game.
Chess is a gentlemans' game! James Bond plays it in his spare time!
That's right, when a man isn't busy shooting the shit out of his enemies, he cleans the bloodstains out of his suit and plays chess.
The girl of the movie asks,
"Darling, where have you been?"
"[insert some 'witty' quote here relating to a pun]"
The girl fondles something under her pillow.
"What's that you have?"
Girl shoots. Bond dead.
BOND DEAD?
Hollywood is going down the drain.
Neil smiled to himself. He would make a great movie director.
Content with the pages he'd read, he set the book aside, careful of the fraying edges.
His long legs allowed the bottom of his cruddy shoes to graze the surface of the water.
He thought back to the classes so far that day-the A&E 101 class, where he witnessed the battle of Zander and the good-smelling June. Was there something that clicked between them, or was that just Zander's good nature combined with June's admiration for others?
And the class with Mr. M- that was pretty kickass. Still, he hadn't gotten around to doing the assignment-write about what's on the board-and didn't intend to, either.
Looking past his slightly soggy shoes, a thought came to mind--
And Jesus crossed the water. And Peter said, 'AWESOME'.
Thinking of Bond's nemisis Octopussy, Neil slipped off his torn shoes, swiss-cheese socks, and looked around.
No one.
Wincing as the bones turned to grey mush, slippery tentacles flipped out from the bottom of his pants and writhed in the water.
Experimenting, they quickly turned bright coral orange, to an inky black, blended with the surface, and formed back to the normal colour again.
He slid off his shirt, and tied it around a nearby pole.
And with that, he dipped into the cool water.
At first, his eyes were clenched shut. But as the transformation formed agonizingly along, his head morphed in a squishy mass, tightening to his waist, his legs splitting into eight. Bubbles frothed up to the surface from his now non-existant lungs.
And his pants sunk to the bottom.
One long tentacle gracefully curled down to it, and pushed up near the surface, tying the legs around the pole.
This wasn't terribly difficult, since he did have the brain of a human, the instinct of an octopus, and eight legs. The only problem was that he had to use one eye instead of two- since humans were predators, they had eyes in the front of their head.
Unlike toads-or octopai-who had them at the sides of their head, so they could see more danger around them.
With the tying done, Neil blissfully swam to the murky bottom, attaching to a rock and changing to its colour.
He looked up to the wavering surface. He could see the bright blue sky, and the dark underside of the deck.
Cool water pulsed around him, threatening to carry him out.
The threat being empty.
He looked back up at the deck, seeing a shadow hovering over the edge.
Brow furrowing, he leaned forward with one hand cupping his chin.
A friend of his once told him, "It doesn't matter how much you play chess-I mean, you don't get better."
He could see where his friend was coming from. It's not as if the pawns could go only three spaces forward if he stopped playing.
The rules stayed the same.
But studying would help give him a better understanding of the game.
Chess is a gentlemans' game! James Bond plays it in his spare time!
That's right, when a man isn't busy shooting the shit out of his enemies, he cleans the bloodstains out of his suit and plays chess.
The girl of the movie asks,
"Darling, where have you been?"
"[insert some 'witty' quote here relating to a pun]"
The girl fondles something under her pillow.
"What's that you have?"
Girl shoots. Bond dead.
BOND DEAD?
Hollywood is going down the drain.
Neil smiled to himself. He would make a great movie director.
Content with the pages he'd read, he set the book aside, careful of the fraying edges.
His long legs allowed the bottom of his cruddy shoes to graze the surface of the water.
He thought back to the classes so far that day-the A&E 101 class, where he witnessed the battle of Zander and the good-smelling June. Was there something that clicked between them, or was that just Zander's good nature combined with June's admiration for others?
And the class with Mr. M- that was pretty kickass. Still, he hadn't gotten around to doing the assignment-write about what's on the board-and didn't intend to, either.
Looking past his slightly soggy shoes, a thought came to mind--
And Jesus crossed the water. And Peter said, 'AWESOME'.
Thinking of Bond's nemisis Octopussy, Neil slipped off his torn shoes, swiss-cheese socks, and looked around.
No one.
Wincing as the bones turned to grey mush, slippery tentacles flipped out from the bottom of his pants and writhed in the water.
Experimenting, they quickly turned bright coral orange, to an inky black, blended with the surface, and formed back to the normal colour again.
He slid off his shirt, and tied it around a nearby pole.
And with that, he dipped into the cool water.
At first, his eyes were clenched shut. But as the transformation formed agonizingly along, his head morphed in a squishy mass, tightening to his waist, his legs splitting into eight. Bubbles frothed up to the surface from his now non-existant lungs.
And his pants sunk to the bottom.
One long tentacle gracefully curled down to it, and pushed up near the surface, tying the legs around the pole.
This wasn't terribly difficult, since he did have the brain of a human, the instinct of an octopus, and eight legs. The only problem was that he had to use one eye instead of two- since humans were predators, they had eyes in the front of their head.
Unlike toads-or octopai-who had them at the sides of their head, so they could see more danger around them.
With the tying done, Neil blissfully swam to the murky bottom, attaching to a rock and changing to its colour.
He looked up to the wavering surface. He could see the bright blue sky, and the dark underside of the deck.
Cool water pulsed around him, threatening to carry him out.
The threat being empty.
He looked back up at the deck, seeing a shadow hovering over the edge.